Tuesday, March 8, 2011

A Reminder of Womanhood

Today is International Woman’s day and a flurry of greetings through mails and sms’s have been floating around. Thanks to all my friends and the corporate world – I appreciate that me and my gender mates are celebrated for our womanhood today. Despite this amongst some sly remarks such as “why not a men’s day?” or “what is special about this day?" and so on and on and on....


The battle of the gender is as old as Adam and Eve. There is no written law that has been binding on women than unwritten customs supported by popular opinions. And hence we find that in most societies, women are conditioned from childhood to accept men as superior beings. But awareness through education and life’s experiences has led women to shed their inhibitions. While the urban Indian women have found their wings and we have spurts of heroism from the rest of the country, these great women leaders, artists, scientists and other professional women are a source of inspiration to transform women from age old inequities.

A woman is a full circle. She has the power to create, nurture and transform. But more often than not, she restricts this power to the confines of her home. True that the building blocks of a great society are laid at home, but the power is subdued mostly by self and some in the name of compromise to lead a happy home. I quote Eleanor Roosevelt that “Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission”. Think about it and I can find a variety of instances where one is responsible for their actions and could have done things differently and probably today is an event to start thinking differently :-)

A woman with a voice by definition is a strong woman. But the search to find that voice can be remarkably difficult. And in that effort individuality is lost and there is wallowing in self-pity. I read some amazing poetry and articles of the turmoil a woman – at the end of it – I admit I also felt a tinge of self-pity...but had to bounce back... There is a power within us to create a change and a lead a transformation. Having made up your mind, there is the next blockage to overcome.

Women still have an uneasy relationship with power and the traits necessary to be a leader. There is this internalized fear that if we are really powerful, we are going to be considered ruthless or pushy or strident--all those epithets that strike right at our femininity. We are still working at trying to overcome the fear that power and womanliness are mutually exclusive. And at this point though there is an intention, we also succumb to upholding only feminism as in the unwritten rules.

Hence this day is marked out to start an endeavour, to make a difference in the life of a woman. With the myriad roles played by a woman – a professional, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a wife, a lover, a partner – not different from the roles of a man – the subtle difference is the feminine power – the power to create, nurture and transform

HAPPY WOMAN'S DAY !!

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

"Cigarettes, whisky and wild, wild women — and a good sense of humor,"

What a wonderful way to summarise the longest innings on earth - Walter Breuning is the oldest man on earth today - living with a zest for life... Well in my humble opinion - he is living life on his terms.

The numerous scientific researches on the bane has not deterred the good old man. He may be an exception to the rule, but are not the No.1's the exception to every man made rule.

This leaves me wondering - on the dichotomy of life. Do I traverse the unknown path to live life on my terms or do I use the rulebook ? So many situations in life have taught me that the rulebook does not apply to me and I deviate - hence i am shunned by some, and loved by many. Do I win ?? Of course I tide over the troughs with ease and I am happy with the results - and that's what matters to me.

I don't do things to live long - but I definitely live life to the fullest. And hence I life to identify with this oldest person on earth - naah... no Cigis, no whiskey but am wild with my sense of humor...

So another zestful day has passed by, with another introspection and verification on life !!

Happy Birthday Walter Breuning !!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

CYA

The name of the game in the corporate world is CYA !

Many forms of this not so often stated strategy - except for coffee table discussions in closed groups. But do we challenge anyone with this. Or do we stop doing it !! NO WAY !! As much as we laugh when other do it, we do it all the time.

The ladder of the corporate hierarchy determines how we do it. As a novice, I did rave and rant. As I started climbing the ladder, I made it a discussion and ensured many peers knew about my plight and I garnered sympathy. Then I started keeping my boss bcc'ed on mails so that (s)he could anticipate what is coming and hence I bought an alibi. And then i learned the smarter way of talking it out to my boss and his peers as in the name of guidance I did CYA. And finally now I am in a mode of proactively keeping my boss informed about what is going to come to him.. Learnt along the path, and know there is miles to traverse before i master the art of CYA !!

Is there anyone who has other innovative ideas for doing so - just makes the learning process faster..

Aha... Another CYA !!

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Come-Back !!

Can a simple mail - bring joy ? I dont know if it is a lasting emotion - but at the moment the over-whelming happiness is beyond all reasoning.

I am feeling happy now and the present is important. Will this happiness last - i dunno, and i dont care about it...

What is important is there is a mail - there is a thought that someone thinks about me still. That is a wonderful feeling for me right now.

Instead of having myriad of questions and thought on the why, how long, how come, am i be simple enough to live with this present. I think so !! Thank you for making my day is all I have to say now :-)

Friday, July 9, 2010

Good-Bye ???

Yes, This is not last of my blogs, rather a new beginning... The questions say it all.

I have understood the power of letting go !! It was hard to internalise that i need to let go. But i had to do it for my own good. The gnawing feeling, the impatient wait of every phone ring, the quick check if it was an sms i was waiting for - all of them had to stop !! And how can i do it ??

I need to talk to express what i feel, but there is not a soul who can hear me without being judgemental about it. And i don't want to feel bad about the past... It was good while it lasted. It is just that all good things come to an end and i have to accept it. Letting go through a mail is rude, and i hope i had other choices. Would it have been better if i had just showed up at the doorstep and demanded an explanation for the rejection ? That is the most stupidest act i could have indulged in and jeopardised everyone's reputation at stake. Should i have called to know what is happening ? Too much of concern in the name of ego....naaah .... cant let that happen. So the only option i had was to send an email and having done that.... Have i really let go ??

Time and distance are the best healers, i am told and believe it... Hope it works its miracle on me again !!

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Outer Success

Does a relationship continue cos your successful ?
Here I am talking about those relationships like that of first circle of family - like aunts, uncles, cousins and friends - of the head and the heart.
And what I mean by outer success is your job, your bank balance, your visible lifestyle....

So does outer success have an impact on the relationship. Most often my experience has been a big YES as far as the family circle is concerned.

And I never felt, I had to question the impact as far as friends are concerned. But in the current phase of life - I begin to wonder... did my employment status impact the friendship... Have i gone wrong somewhere where i may have lost on some precious friends of the heart. I sincerely hope not... I love my friends and hate to lose them. But a big BUT.... when i need my friends the most at this hour... what has created this distance - that they have lost their little time for me ?

It pains and I am not able to reason it out. I value Friendship as the best relationship i have had and every person as a friend has left a mark in my life. We may not be in constant touch - but they have moved my life in a way which can be attributed only to them - do they know that ? I don't know - but i will be indebted to them for life.

Does outer success have an impact on the delicate fabric of friendship ? Any answers ??

Sunday, October 4, 2009

A New Ending....

Wanted to try something different... and I thought, I always make a new beginning in various aspects of life... why not try to predict a new end and start backward ?

I have been off the traditional path in more ways than one.. surprises you ? For some it may, for some it may not.... and when I talk about an ending, I am sure I can imagine a few raised eyebrows :-)

I would like to end some top of the mind cliches... For one I am going to stop being available as a doormat.... when you feel there is dirt on your heels, something cozy to clean yourself.... I am going to stop feeling guilty for drawing attention to self... I am worth what I am and if I am drawing attention, it is to those who wanna be drawn :-) So easy to type out thoughts than implement them, but at least this is a humble end to the agony of the self !!